Monday, August 15, 2011

Scared Straight

          I do not usually allow myself to get dragged into the middle of political debates.  Having more degrees than a thermometer, this is my brother’s arena and best left to him.  However, in today’s politically charged climate, I feel it necessary to climb atop my soapbox and weigh in.  I have to warn readers that my comments may be offensive, but I will not apologize for the truths that I hold closest and will spout them on occasion if compelled…and after certain comments made by recent presidential contenders, I am convicted to write.
                This country affords many opportunities and I feel very fortunate to have been blessed to have been born in a southern home with traditional Christian values that were tested and then disregarded by my parents who chose to love me, their gay son, unconditionally.  My parents were bible-toting, foot- stomping, revival-loving Christians and after they found out that I was not going to be what they had imagined me to be, they prayed for answers and most often the ones that they found were from a society that holds homosexuals in poor regard or in downright contempt. 
Not only does the bible say that it is immorally and sinfully wrong to be gay, but most people think it is wrong, or not right, or just unnatural to be gay.  While I do not agree with those that spout biblical rhetoric as justification to their prejudices, I can understand their convictions.  Let me explain, why this point is so relevant to the mass population as well.
You have most likely heard that America is a puritanical society.  This is undisputed.  America was founded within the limited constraints of religion.  This “religiosity” or fundamental approach to our lives as a whole is still very much pervasive today.  Whether or not you are Christian, Baptist, Jewish, Muslim, or any number or combination of faiths, you are influenced by them and their doctrines.  Sorry to inform you, but yes, even you, the Agnostics, Wiccans, Mystics and Atheists are shaped by the same “godly” principles.  This is called social conditioning and it is inescapable.  We are all brought up believing in dogma whether it is from our parents, our friends and relatives, our churches or through advertising. 
Today, advertising is most arguably the biggest and direct influence in any of our lives.  We are bombarded from birth images that portray heterosexuality as the ideal.  Love is for heterosexuals.  Sex is for heterosexuals.  Marriage and family are also only relevant and natural for heterosexuals.  Anything in contrast is morally reprehensible and detrimental to our societal fabric.  Being gay is wrong.  If you choose to be a fag, you will live a life of pain and lonely bitterness.”  Pay attention, WE ARE ALL TAUGHT THIS MESSAGE!  IT IS NOT SUBTLE.  IT IS OVERT AND VERY BLATENT. 
There have been few great advancements in the rights of gay people in this country or even globally, because no matter your sexual orientation, you are socially conditioned to hate gay people.  I will not argue the semantics of that statement with Christians that say “We love the sinner, but hate the sin.”  We are all taught that we hate gay.  This is especially tragic for gay people, because they grow up hating themselves. 
Because most of my faithful readers know that I can never seem to make a point without circumnavigating around and through and then back again, I will try now to do so.  To my gay family, my brothers and sisters who have known more struggle and oppression than is imaginable to most, we must become a viable force in this country to effect long term change.  We have to stop hating ourselves and stop tearing each other down in bars, gyms and cafes due to labels that society defines appropriate.
“He’s too fem.”  “He’s a gym bunny.”  “He’s a nelly bottom.”  “He’s a slut.”  Just stop and insist on better, because let me tell you now that the straight girls that you may be dancing with, or your straight fraternity brothers that you share beer with, will NEVER know you like that queer that you might be making fun of.   It is impossible for a single straight person to empathize with who you are in the core way that all gay people can relate. 
Listening to Michele Bachmann, I am reminded of the significance of solidarity.  I believe that the issues that should matter in the next election will take a backseat to issues in the bedroom.  All the heterosexually oriented people, despite race or gender, which cast their vote, will undoubtedly and far outnumber the homosexual.  There are more people that will choose to express their distaste for homosexuals while in the safe and anonymous confines of the ballot booth than not. Those same people that laugh at Will & Grace and party with us at clubs are the same ones that will vote against our rights in the next election and I am frightened…and I for one will be scared straight to the polls, if nothing more than with a single message.  “I refuse to allow your blatant or subconscious views to define the individual view of myself any longer.  I will love myself in the way that I love others and will be an example for a generation.”

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